OK, I admit it. Some days it’s a little difficult to get my creative juices flowing. When Sun Salutations and extra coffee just don’t do it for me, I resort to my secret weapon, a form of domestic meditation known to women the world over for centuries but seldom revealed in public.
I iron. Yes, that’s right. I cozy up to an overflowing basket of white handkerchiefs, plaid table napkins and assorted cotton shirts and let the good times roll.
Who says that it is necessary to sit cross legged on a cushion and empty ones mind of all thoughts to clear away the fog? It may work for monks on a mountain top but not for most people. Anyone who has ever found peace while polishing a car, swaying to soothe a baby, chopping wood in a forest or scrubbing a floor on hands and knees, knows that repetitive motion, scent, sound and practical activity can do the trick. So, let me tell you about my personal salvation through an ordinary household task.
The Set Up
To achieve maximum effect from ironing as a mental relaxation technique it’s necessary to make it a multisensory experience. First, I set up my board at maximum height and fill the tank of my steam iron, the one with the extra long cord for ease of motion.
I say bah to those Teflon coated modern irons or ironing board covers. Who wants to inhale unknown carcinogens at high heat? Go for the best Old School steam iron and cotton board cover you can afford and threaten to kill any careless soul who scorches them.
Then, I scuttle to the nearest radio or TV audio source to crank up the volume on my tunes. I suppose an iPod headset would work, but I prefer the vibrations of real throbbing base tones to increase my pulse rate. Good vibrations are essential.
I set out the heaping ironing basket in a prominent spot (middle of the hallway works well) for any and all onlookers to witness my virtuous ironing behavior and dare them to stop me with their petty requests for assistance with everyday matters.
I position the house phone and cell phone nearby so that I can scan incoming calls, but I seldom interrupt my flow with conversations. In my view, good ironing meditation is a solitary and mostly silent activity.
The Nose Knows
The most important ingredient is the choice of ironing spray. My current favorite is a Ginger Grapefruit Pomelo spritz, a tangy citrus scent that steams up from the glistening ironing board into my face and sinuses. This is a substance you can admit to inhaling fully in whatever social circles you move in. And there is the added benefit of a free moisturizing facial as you work.
Of course, some items cry out for spray sizing or even starch to give them some backbone, but mostly just water is all that is needed to sort out even the most pressing matters.
Assume the Position
Stand up straight and address the board with your best posture. Bottom out, shoulders down and back, spine fully extended and arms moving freely as you glide the iron back and forth in a continuous, soothing motion.
At some point, you may wish to get your whole body into the act by swinging your hips and stomping your feet. I’ve found that “Get it On (Bang a Gong)” by T. Rex (1970) or Elton John’s 1974 “The Bitch is Back,” or just about any 1970’s oldies have just the right rhythm to encourage rocking out over the board. If you’re feeling a bit more soulful, I’d suggest a dose of Motown.
Attack Your Wrinkles Head On
There are not many problems in life that you can “iron out” in just an hour or so. There is tremendous satisfaction to be had in poking the pointy end of that gurgling, hot iron into crevices and leaning in with pressure across broad expanses of fabric to render them helpless in the face of your determination to achieve uniform smoothness.
Go crazy on the collar and cuffs of your favorite Oxford cloth shirt. Give those ornery flaps on khaki cargo pants your best extra shot. Release aggression and embrace a peaceful pile of fragrant, pressed pillowcases for a low cost sense of accomplishment and productivity.
The Love that Dare Not Speak its Name
I know it’s not cool to like ironing. But I suspect that there are others who, like me, seek such unspeakable satisfactions. Come out those of you who are (linen) closet junkies. Admit that you admire, no adore, freshly pressed jeans and crisply pleated curtains. Come clean about a pleasure that you can attain at any time of the day or night.
Ironing is good for insomniacs (except for those who prefer shining shoes in the wee hours) and over eaters (who can handle a sandwich without two free hands?). And people really appreciate it when you offer them their same old clothes with a “well pressed is well dressed” spirit that puts a skip in their step.
As far as I can see, there is no down side to this ironing meditation. It’s simply an innocent past time that offers a fresh start, a clear mind and a can-do feeling to the day.
Hints and Tips
- Take a peek at the labels inside your clothes before you press on. Some contemporary fabrics are full of synthetic fibers that just can’t take the heat.
- Ignore those so called “no iron” claims on most shirts and knits. It just means that it will take less time to smooth them out. They always look and feel better with a little TLC.
- Draw the line on ironing men’s t-shirts and boxers unless you really need an energy boost. They never notice your efforts. Ironing underwear is only for serious procrastinators or fetishists.
- Challenge yourself to do duvet covers and sheets when you feel sorely underappreciated. Those sneaky Europeans have sit-down ironing machines with rollers for these things, some of which are even wood fired. But there is no need to immerse yourself this deeply in an ironing regimen unless you also enjoy scrubbing your front steps.
- Take a moment to appreciate the hidden charms of everyday chores and treat them as a way to keep you humble, helpful and self-caring.
So, how about it? Are you ready to iron out a few kinks in your mental capacity in a way even your grandmother would approve?
Tags: aggression, creative, insomnia, meditation, multisensory, peaceful, relaxation, whole body
